Sympathy Message Wording Checker
Paste a draft and get a list of phrases worth reviewing. This is an editing aid, not a verdict on your relationship or the recipient’s beliefs. Your draft stays in the browser.
What to check before sending
The checker looks for minimizing phrases, explanations, pressure, belief assumptions, vague offers, and public-privacy risks. It will not know the recipient as well as you do.
What this checker can and cannot tell you
A phrase is not automatically wrong because it appears on a review list. “They are in a better place,” for example, may be deeply comforting within a shared faith and unhelpful when belief is uncertain. Use the note as a prompt to ask whether the sentence is true for this recipient.
The checker also cannot verify names, dates, family relationships, medical facts, service information, or causes of death. Public posts deserve a separate privacy check with the immediate family.
Use the checker as a second read, not as an automatic censor
The tool looks for patterns that deserve human review: minimizing phrases, explanations of the death, pressure to respond, assumed beliefs, vague offers of help, and privacy risks in public channels. Context can make some flagged wording appropriate.
A useful two-pass workflow
- First edit for truth: remove assumptions, invented closeness, speculation and promises you cannot keep.
- Then edit for burden: shorten questions, remove pressure to reply, and make practical help specific.
- For public posts, do a third privacy pass with the immediate family or authorized person.